Love, no matter where one goes, or what one does it cannot be escaped. Yet to some it is most elusive, they yearn and search, to only be disappointed and burned by it. When I was young, I dreamed of love as this fairy tale I would one day step into. Marriage, childbirth, and divorce taught me lessons about love that forced me to realize it is a process, not a fairy tale. It amazes me how one can provoke the feeling of immense joy, and ten minutes later, that very same person can provoke intense sorrow. Bottom line, I want to believe that everyone, no matter where you are or what you do, is loved by someone else. The problem is, those who believe they are unloved, have created a mental defense mechanism to the converse; they have created situations to make themselves unlovable, favoring the victimized, “woe is me, no one loves me” concept. They still must be loved anyway.
When I examine love from a less romantic but more practical approach, I am amazed love is the one thing that we are all expected to know how to do, yet we are not taught how to do it. We are taught how to do almost everything else, we are taught to eat, speak, add, subtract, write, read, walk, cook, but love? Where are we taught to love? I have taught many subjects, and never on any curriculum in all of the states where I have worked in education, have I seen a class offered on love. In a recent discussion with the love of my life, I asked him to share his thoughts. He was pretty determined to get his point across, but he felt that love should happen naturally; “We are all born with the instinct to love, then society teaches how not to.” Well said, but I have a problem with that. We are relying on society to teach how not to love and that will serve as an education on how to love? That, to me, is absurd, but for many, it is true. I proudly have taken on the role to be the first teacher to my daughter. Parents are in fact a child’s first teacher. Sadly many fail in that role; they still must be loved anyway.
A few years ago I met a wonderful pair of gentlemen who declared 2008 as the year of love. They had a nifty logo, and began a grass roots approach in the Raleigh area. Their message was a simple one, “if people knew how to call upon the infinite power of love in their daily lives, the world would be a much better place.” I attended a meeting and was truly inspired. Right then and there I decided to be a soldier in the “love-o-lution”. I am still spreading the word to my students and friends. My desire is to encourage everyone to put more love into everything. Mother Theresa once said “Being unwanted, unloved, uncared for, forgotten by everybody, I think that is a much greater hunger, a much greater poverty than the person who has nothing to eat.” No truer words have been spoken. We must wage a “Love-o-lution” to love, care for, and most importantly forgive. We have to teach our young people the importance of love in their actions, the need for kindness in their words, and we must show them, how to forgive. Even those who cannot forgive; they still must be loved anyway.
I attended a media conference recently and one of my idols, a major media mogul, was the keynote speaker. This man was single-handedly responsible for being an important architect in the development of a major genre of music and he opened doors for a slew of performers still impacting the industry at present. He was asked by an audience member to express what he believes the music industry is missing at this moment, what is there a need for? His response was a humble, yet powerful one, “Love.” He paused then continued, “the message of love has been lost and a movement must be started to bring it back.” Chills ran up my spine. We have to recognize the importance of love in our actions and demand it from those we allow to entertain us. For those who put out harmful, negative, ugly images for the sake of earning a dollar, they still must be loved anyway.
I believe that the people who harbor bitterness and resentment induce their own stress and illness. I am no doctor, but common sense and a vast array of studies will back that theory. I have a dear friend who is growing weary from the lessons that have been taught to her by choosing to love the wrong person. I pray for her that she will learn to let go, and open her heart and mind to the idea that love can be a wonderful thing when she heals, learns to trust, and chooses wisely. In her brilliant song, Sade has declared her place as a “Soldier of Love”; her message of pressing on should inspire the masses. Simply put, the universe will provide you with what your thoughts declare. You harbor ugliness and hate in your heart, ugliness and hate will come to you. Dr. Martin Luther King believed “Hatred paralyzes life; love releases it. Hatred confuses life; love harmonizes it. Hatred darkens life; love illuminates it.” Amen! So for this coming year, what will your thoughts and actions provide?
Niki Kendall is an educator and author of the adult fiction page turner Makin' Happy. For more info, visit http://www.makinhappy-thebook.com/
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Niki Kendall is an educator and author of the adult fiction page turner Makin' Happy. For more information or to purchase Makin' Happy click here:
http://www.authorhouse.com/Bookstore/BookDetail.aspx?BookId=SKU-000255287
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